… we may inadvertently shame them out of emotions seen as negative, jump to a solution and fail to help them to see these emotions as inherently valuable.
至少在我成長過程中，我是不允許有任何不快樂的情緒的。
Normal, natural emotions are now seen as good or bad. And being positive has become a new form of moral correctness. … It’s a tyranny. It’s a tyranny of positivity. And it is cruel. Unkind. And ineffective.
其實還是呼應了我前面説的我不喜歡正面精這樣。
If there’s one common feature of brooding, bottling or false positivity, it’s this: they are all rigid responses. And if there’s a single lesson we can learn from the inevitable fall of apartheid, it is that rigid denial doesn’t work.
仍然是呼應了演講開頭説的，粗暴簡化的應對方式，都不是最佳的情緒調節策略。
Research on emotional suppression shows that when emotions are pushed aside or ignored, they get stronger. Psychologists call this amplification. … You might think you’re in control of unwanted emotions when you ignore them, but in fact they control you. Internal pain always comes out. Always.
其實就跟之前説的，情緒需要調節，而不是閃躲或者忽視。
Only dead people never get stressed, never get broken hearts, never experience the disappointment that comes with failure. Tough emotions are part of our contract with life. You don’t get to have a meaningful career or raise a family or leave the world a better place without stress and discomfort.
這讓我想起了一個訪談的内容
我覺得現代人不見得那麽想談戀愛
The KK Show – #52 Ken的私人診療室 – 唐綺陽 – 百靈果
你不要相信他們嘴巴說的
其實大家都非常害怕人際關係
忽然遇到一個人馬上煩惱就來了
我怕我hold不住
萬一他不喜歡我怎麽辦
然後他就走了
完蛋了我多纍積了一道傷痕
所以如果沒那麽喜歡
能不要就不要
很多人就這樣子不談
是的，有時候我們真的會怕（事實上你在這個時候問我我還是會怕）。但是，遲早我們都得正面跟這恐懼交手，因爲
Discomfort is the price of admission to a meaningful life.
挑戰固然是不讓人舒服的，但跨越了就是成長。
Research now shows that the radical acceptance of all of our emotions even the messy difficult ones is the cornerstone of resilience, thriving, and true authentic happiness.
這裏我必須說的是，由於我不是在academic圈，加上我本來就不是心理學專家。我雖然到現在爲止轉述很多學者專家宣稱研究顯示怎樣怎樣，但我是無從找到該份研究報告就是。但至少在這段講詞，内容還是跟前面甚至跟上一篇功課有所呼應就是。
But emotion agility is more than just an acceptance of emotions. We also know that accuracy matters. In my own research, I found that words are essential. We often use quick and easy labels to describe our feelings. “I’m stressed!” is the most common one I hear. But there’s a world of difference between stress and disappointment or stress that knowing dread of “I’m in the wrong career.”. When we label our emotions accurately, we are more able to discern the precise cause of our feelings.
這就有點約略點到linguistic的部分，英文部分我不熟悉，但中文的部分，我們的確開始默默讓一些字詞概括了以往多元的選字（可以自己去翻陳雲先生系列著作）。比如我們不再講自傲自豪，現在我們都講驕傲。我們不再說分擔分憂，我們都一律說分享。情緒的字詞也一樣，我們漸漸用通用簡短的字詞，去表達多元的情緒。誰還有那個閑情逸致，花幾百字去解釋自己情緒？
When we label our emotions more accurately, we are more able to discern the precise cause of our feelings. And what scientists call the readiness potential in our brain is activated, allowing us to take concrete steps. But not just any steps, the right steps for us. Because our emotions are data. Our emotions contain flashing lights to things that we care about.
回顧第一份的功課，我們會發現到正確意識自己的情緒，是可以及早發現我們思緒發出的一些信號警示。而且正正因爲情緒不是毫無來由，或無理取鬧irrational的產物，只有我們在乎的東西才會啓動這些警示。
When we are open to the difficult emotions, we are able to generate responses that are values-aligned. But there’s an important caveat. Emotions are data, they are not directives. … We own our emotions, they don’t own us. When we internalize the difference between how I feel in all my wisdom and what I do in a values-aligned action, we generate the pathway to our best selves via our emotions.
所以其實這段的意義，還是回到上一篇功課説的，當情緒上來的時候，先停下來鑒定是什麽樣的情緒，它在呼應什麽樣的事情，傳達什麽訊息。但同時間保持自己的理智，在不忽視情緒需求下，讓之牽動自己的言行反應。
In my research, when I looked at what helps people to bring the best of themselves to work, I found a powerful key contributor: individualized consideration. When people are allowed to feel their emotional truth, engagement, creativity and innovation flourish in the organization. Diversity isn’t just people, it’s also what’s inside people, including diversity of emotion.
最近去的conference，也約略談到diversity這個課題。當然這個詞不同人有不同的詮釋，但是在這裏這個context，我覺得speaker，David提出的，是我們得正視所有類型的情緒。
Emotional agility is the ability to be with your emotions with curiosity, compassion, and especially the courage to take values-connected steps.
其實Emotional agility的概念，跟之前功課提過的東西很類似，主要還是正視自己情緒，然後做出相應的舉動和決定。我很喜歡在這段話之後的結語，但我不覺得我可以生出更好的解説，所以有時間讀到這裏的人可以點進去一看。
很感人吧。
然後我發現這16分鐘的演講我寫了兩個小時，我的天！
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