第二次諮商結束沒多久，我就開始準備出國參與老闆倉促決定要我出席的研討會（和過後年中的度假）。研討會和一些後續的工作占了我大概一星期，接下來啊的那幾天我都在都別林閑晃。所以在哪兩個星期我是沒太多時間翻閲我的功課（尤其一些還是影片）。回來後，才抓出一點空擋開始慢慢閲讀，慢慢觀看記筆記（我看資訊類影片，尤其是要寫筆記的話，會花至少三倍影片的時間）。
學習無爲
首先是這部關於backwards law影片
Backwards Law在諮商時，有約略提到，但那是建立在轉念的部分。這影片解釋的角度，則又更深入一些。
What if we’d try not to think of a pink elephant. This probably won’t work. Because as soon as the pink elephant appears in our minds, it’s impossible to get rid of it by consciously not thinking about it. And the more we try to get rid of it, the more it persists.
Stop Trying to Get It And You’ll Have It | The Backwards Law – Einzelgänger
其實這就是老生常談的，你越想要忘記，你記憶就越鮮明的概念。
Ironically, the more we try to be less dissatisfied, the more dissatisfied we become.
所以某程度，同理可證，當你越想要擺脫不滿，你就會因爲在過程中不斷提醒自己多不滿，而越陷越深。影片内容會越來越充滿禪意和説教，所以慎閱。
… also referred to as ‘the backwards law’ by philosopher Alan Watts. The backwards law proposes that the more we pursue something, the more we achieve the opposite of what we truly want and the more disappointed we feel.
對一些目標越是進取，反而到最後得不到相應的結果。
On the flip side: when we stop trying, we’ll have what we want.
但當你對此無所作爲，卻往往能達成。這樣聼下來，倒是有點道教提倡的「無爲」的感覺（當然我理解可能有誤歡迎留言賜教）。
But the backwards law isn’t so much not about worldly achievements – if anything, it transcends them. It’s about getting what we really, truly want. It’s the shortcut to the holy grail; the thing we’re all after; the goodie. But what is it?
這裏説的目標，超越了字面能表達的概念。真正的問題是，我們欲求的，究竟是什麽？
Is it wealth? Is it love? Is it friendship? Is it a long and healthy life? Even though such things are pleasurable; they’re just cheap imitations of the real thing. They are the things that we believe will lead us to what we seek. But, as the backwards law makes clear, the more we seek, the less we find. The more we chase these outside circumstances, the further we’ll be removed from what we truly desire.
越説越玄了吧，但某程度這概念也不難懂。躲在這些物質或數值背後的，往往才是我們追求的目標。可是，確切來説這些到底是什麽？
According to Alan Watts, we don’t know what we truly want because we cannot define it.
“Why don’t you really know what you want?
Two reasons that you don’t really know what you want. Number one: you have it. Number two: you don’t know yourself, because you never can.
The Godhead is never an object of its own knowledge, just as a knife doesn’t cut itself, fire doesn’t burn itself, light doesn’t illuminate itself.”
所以，我們一直在追求的這些物質和數字，往往跟終極目標沒有關係，反而背道而馳。
We feel lacking because of our discontent with current circumstances. The greater our discontent, the more we suffer. The greater change we need to be content, the less content we are.
通常當我們努力去達成一些成就時，是爲了填補一些空缺，比如錢財朋友讚數（來最終獲得快樂）等等。可是在達成這些目標的途中，我們往往同時間也會不斷提醒自己所擁有的是多麽匱乏，進而更不快樂。
But if you’d significantly lower the threshold, your feeling of inadequacy will decrease, as the goalpost is moved much closer to where you are. Nevertheless, we still choose to set the bar high; oftentimes far above our current position, and by doing so our feeling of inadequacy is deep and persisting.
但如果設立的目標不要遠離現實太遠，那空虛感則會隨之緩解。可是説實在，我們在現實生活聽到最多的勸告，往往是「你爲何不試著更努力達成更高的目標呢？」。
The human tendency to continually pursue more as a cure for the itch, while simultaneously maintaining that itch by that very pursuit, seems illogical. And that’s precisely the case according to German philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer. Schopenhauer concluded that we want what we want because, like anything else in the universe, we are representations of the will-to-live or, simply, the will. Schopenhauer argued that the ‘will’ is an illogical, directionless, continual striving that causes us to live a life of suffering that cannot be ended by anything that the world has to offer. Because of this, we pathologically want more than we need, driven by an incessant sense of lack.
其實這一大段説的還是前面提過的，我們在追求的是終極目標的表象，但其實這些我們自以爲的表象跟終極目標沒有任何關係。而在追求的途中，我們往往會不斷提醒自己是多麽缺乏這些東西。但由於表象跟我們無法定義的終極目標根本沒關係，所以所有的努力往往都是徒勞無功。
According to Schopenhauer, the will is why we strive; the will is why we seek. But following it never isatisfies, because the will itself is the very thing that keeps us from getting what we want.
所以就算達成了表象的目標，儘管會有滿足感，但通常很短暫，畢竟表象終究不是終極的目標。而我們的意志，雖然推動我們去追求更多，但在過程中卻把我們推離確切想要的那個終極目標。
Schopenhauer argued that the only way to be truly content is the negation of the will, which leads to a blissful, empty state, free of striving. In other words: stop trying to get it and you’ll have it.
所以不要把自己往死裏去推去努力，往往更加能夠從此擺脫無窮無盡的欲望。我想比較好的解讀方式，應該是看清這些表象并不是達到目標指標，認清了然後重新調整目標，讓之成爲一個你實際可能達成的事情，那麽在努力的過程就不會因此時刻深刻提醒自己的匱乏，從而更可能接近真正想要的目標。
比如説如果你想要用金錢達到快樂，那就不要設立一個努力十世也不能達成的財富目標這樣。
He does not store, and therefore he has a superabundance; he looks solitary, but has a multitude around him.
In his conducting of himself he is easy and leisurely and wastes nothing. He does nothing, and laughs at the clever and ingenious. Men all seek for happiness, but he feels complete in his imperfect condition.
Lao Dan (Lao Tzu), Zhuangzi, Tian Xia, 5
影片甚至截取了道家的文本，其實説到底，就是知足常樂這句老生常談。
Being aware of the workings of the backwards law doesn’t mean that we should never set goals, never have ambitions, or never pursue change. There’s probably an endless amount of reasons why we should make a change, and shouldn’t accept the status quo. However, the backwards law does teach us not to be fooled by the idea that the pursuit of happiness leads to happiness. It’s quite the opposite. And with that knowledge, we’re able to enter that blissful state of ‘not wanting’ a bit more often. Because, as Alan Watts stated: “The mystery of life is not a problem to be solved but a reality to be experienced.”
這呼應了我前面説的，目標可以設立，但得認清追求的是表象而且不要過分好高騖遠。
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